Your Worst Nightmare
by GreatKateZonkeyMachine
Summary: Possibly the most daring thing I will ever write, for a number of reasons. Read if you dare, and only if you have a very good eye doctor. Not for the faint of heart or the easily offended.


Disclaimer: **Yes, I do own the Mysterious Benedict Society. Deal with it.**

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More Important Disclaimer: **THIS IS NOT REAL. I already know there are some ding-dongs out there who don't recognize sarcasm when they see it, but THIS IS A SATIRE! I just decided to poke some fun at all the stories in this fandom that make sane people want to slit our wrists (as well as the authors who are irked so much by them ;). I imagine it was written by some person whose only knowledge of MBS comes from the fandom. And they probably hate Sticky. I was going to wait until April Fools' Day/Week to post this, but I have something else planned – let's just say, you're in for a surprise this coming April that will necessitate the complete reconstruction of my profile page….**

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Even More Important Disclaimer: **The views expressed – explicitly or otherwise – do not express those of The-B00k-was-better. The imagined author of this fic is purely that.**

**PS. The saddest thing is, **_**this person grew up in the US with English as their first and only language!**_

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A little bit about me: Hi, my name is LaFonFonTasiah Loretta Brown Jackson. and I am insanely in love with PJO and MBS. I never really tried writing I thoguht it might be fun and so I thought the best place to try it out was FFN b/cz its kindof not important and I don't really tink i ned to really take it srsly! lol

rEYNIE pov

hIE,IM rENYIE mOOLDOON. iM 16 & I live in New

york city. My friends are Katr and Sticky Washington,but their only 15 years.I also have another friend whos not really my freind, but shes shes kinda mean. But she can read minds and she's 5 years old too/

But rigt now I was paceing around in a circles around a big couch,whating for Late to wake up."Kate"I shouted;"Its time for breackfeast! Were gonna miss it!

So she got up and got dressed while I was deciding to wait inpatiently. Are you doen yet? I asked inpatiently.

"Of course I am!" She snapped bsck at me. i noticed her hair was beatiful and she looked like the demi-God fro Aphrodite.

When we finnly got down to the kichen mrs. Perumal said "oh Reynie, your hair's to messed up, go back up and change this instance, young man!'

I scowled at her. "But Mom!" **she adopted me**. I like my hair the way it ism all messed-upey, cause it adds to me good looks. Im really popular in school and I have like a million dates. I'm on the swim team and my last girlfriend says I had an amazing bodhy, yea I work out since was thirteen. But ntone of those girls felt right to me,and I seriously think kate is jealous of me. The only guys who don't like me is the teachers – I think they are intimidated by me. Stickys not as popler as me. and Constance is just in the grade of 5.

"Hey do you want to go to taht concert tonight." I said to Kate, and she said yes, sticky's coming too.'

"_**NO!**_" Said my new mom. "I have to see what is is first."

So we were waiting for her to figure it out and then MR. Benedict calme down stairs.

And whos Mr Beenedict you ask?Well hes a genius old man who has a disableing of sleep at inappropriate times. "Hey your not going to believe this news He said terrible."

"What's it?" we ass laid at the same time.

"My beother has escaepd.!" He said gravely.

"_**WHAT"**_ WE all said again at te same stime,Mr. Curtain was a nother brother of MrBenedics whose evil. He made a advanced device k.a. the Whisper. It could brainsweep the person and message into peoples mindon piggyback-signals.

And then Perumal came back in accompanied with Number2 and Rhonda, they look like a pen. "Well you can go to the convert," said her.

We all lumped for joy and I wnet to go get ready, "Hey why don't we go to Starboooks and wiat." Kate said walking with her usal sturdy gate. Allright lets go!

_meanwhile…;…_

Wen I went to the bathrom at starbucks their was this Guy in there., and he was kind of freaky-looking.

"?" he asked.

"Yeah." "Okay, good. But I"

"Your gay?" i said mildly surpissed.

"Whats your name?"

"Lightningrod Gary-Stu Jones: said.

So I went back out there. And I told them about him. "Hes spikey black hr and with a pink Lightning-Bold in his hair. But hes like Poth and the Goth Dudre is Gay."

"Woah!" explained my friends.

And when we went to the conert I found out that Lightning was goin to. "Hey man" I said for him. "Dey Hude!" he said back.

But then I noticed KAte was MISSING

To be continued…

_A pervview of tah next chappie: Katy was stealde by Curtain because shes Renee's one tru love and Curtain wants to get him. When he rescues they kiss hitmnl, and Sticky falls in love w/ Lightningrod._

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_Justs so you bee warned;_

_Gay people are inhuman._

_Black people are stupid._

_Women are weak._

_Men are uncompassionate._

_The Tea Party is out to get us._

_Foreigners are illegal._

_Jews are wrong._

_Muslims want to kill America._

_If you are any of these things, you are not worth it._

_Bye!_

_~FonFon_

A/N I LYK WNT 36574623 REVIWS OR I WONT POST DA NEXT CHAPPIE!1!

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**UPDATE: Thank you all for your reviews of this story. If you review this, please consider reviewing some of my ****_real_**** stories as well.**


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